Thursday, 29 May 2014

Diary Post #63.

Dear Diary.. 

There is nothing like having an amazing "support network". Ever since I found out I was expecting my second child in November 2013, I have really found out who my "true" friends are! Some have completely snubbed me, so I binned them off,  & others have really supported me & shown me what having a "real" friend means. 

When I first found out I was pregnant, although we had been trying for 14 & half months, it hit me really hard & I was a bag of nerves! I never actually imagined it happening again, & after everything I went through with Joel, falling pregnant & the possibility of our second baby also having the problems he did, lay heavy on my mind. I struggled rather a lot for the first 5 months, constantly thinking about it & praying it wasn't going to happen, & thankfully it never did, but it was having that one friend there supporting me that got me through! she listened to my worries, let me vent & most of all, gave me a shoulder to cry on & didn't judge me! The second half of my pregnancy has been amazing, I have very much relaxed & enjoyed every moment. something I never once did with Joel, so it has been nice! & this is all thanks to my best friend Natasha Cooper. Nobody else. 

I can't wait for her to meet her god daughter for the first time in 5 weeks time because from beginning to end she has been there for me! both myself & Neil couldn't think of a better person to be our children's god parent. Natasha truly has shown me what a best friend is & has helped me through so much! everything just comes so easy with her, we both have boys the same age, & we've both suffered with depression & anxiety! we basically bounce off each other & help pull each other up on our bad days! we are quite literally inseparable, & in my eyes, that's what a friendship should be! none of this, "oh my problems are bigger than yours" crap. Can't be dealing with that shit man.

I am just so happy right now, & I am finally in a place were I have wanted to be for the past 12 months, I have finally reached the end of that tunnel & I know for a fact that if I do slip again, I have people as well as my husband who will hold my hand & pull my back up, so I know that I don't need to worry!! Life is good.

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